A New Me Foundation, INC.


Thursday, August 26, 2010

ONE UGLY WORD........DIVORCE!!

Wow, can you believe it? I said the word that no one likes to hear especially married couples....DIVORCE!! Yes, it is a dreadful word and at times, a difficult experience for some people. I honestly believe that God doesn't put more on us than we can bear. You might want to consider me a living testimony of that Bible verse. God knew very well that I would be an emotional work of art in the courtroom if I had to go back and forth with my now ex-husband. But only my God, allowed me to get a divorce and not even have to look my husband at the time, in the eye once. No custody battles, not even those strenous court fees. God made a promise to me that he would put my enemies under my feet and He meant business. Now don't get me wrong, my ex was never my enemy. It was satan himself working through my husband at the time. So God put a stop to satan's plan to destroy me, into better works for His glory to be used by Him (God).

I tell people all the time, the domestic violence I went through in my marriage had absolutely nothing to do with me personally. It happened to bring about a change in other people lives and an avenue to be used by God, Himself. You can't asked for anything more than that. So I thank God daily for using me, to speak to a broken population of women and their children who have been abused on all levels.

DIVORCE.....is an ugly word that even the Bible says, God hates. I don't believe He hates it so much that He would also hate you if that's what's best for you and your family. Alot of time women who stay in abusive marriages deal with emotionally and verbally torture of what the "church folks" might say? Let me tell you one thing is for certain: Church folks will talk about you whether it's something good or bad!

You don't owe the church any explanation to the decisions you need to make for the safety of yourself and of your children. You have to pour out your heart to God and allow Him to mend whatever broken pieces you have before or after your divorce, back together. I held on to my marriage for dear life it seemed like. My marriage became my idol.....and we all know that's a big no, no to God. I read almost every book and went through counseling and listened to family and friends. I neglected to reach out to God and see what His answer was all along.

Divorce is never something easy to do or be done with afterwards for some people. That's why trusted family members, friends, books, co-workers, clergy, therapists, support groups, etc are an essential backbone for those of us who have to deal with this ugly word. It took alot out of me to step out on faith and meet new friends, go to new places alone and focus on my dreams and goals, now that I am divorced. I say those things because usually married couples share the same friends and are involved in the same social environments. So once you get divorced, things ultimately change: no more couples nights out, bbq's together, kids car pooling together for school, married ministries at church--- you are now to sit in the singles section LOL if you decide to stay at the church together.

I pray for those who have to deal with the harsh realities of the worst cases of divorce. But give your situation over to God and He'll give you strength to walk away. I remember asking God to do for me, what I couldn't do myself...which was totally walk away from my abusive relationship. I stand here today to let you know that the road gets better to make your journey easier through life once you let go and let God do His will.

Divorce is the end result of a marriage, but not the end of your life. I hope this helped you in some way to fulfill your greatest potentials in life and if you've fallen down in life, allow yourself to be picked back up again and enjoy God's grace and new mercies everyday.

BREAK THE SILENCE OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE!!!

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